Yesterday we discussed the reports Yosef brought about his brothers to his father, Yaakov. We saw that the verse itself (37:2) may allude to Yosef's sincere motives in this regard. He did not report of his brothers' wrongdoing to his father for personal aggrandizement, or to bolster his standing within this family. He genuinely hoped that his father could yield some positive influence on the brothers and help them improve.
This point notwithstanding, Chazal are nevertheless sharply critical of Yosef's conduct. The Midrash (Bereishit Rabba 84; Tanchuma; Pirkei de-Rabbi Eliezer 38; Yerushalmi, Masekhet Pei'a 1) writes that Yosef brought to Yaakov three accusations against the brothers, and for all three he was punished measure for measure. He accused them of eating meat taken from an animal prior to slaughtering; therefore, he was punished through the brothers' slaughtering a goat as part of their plan to conceal their sale of Yosef. He accused them of verbally abusing the sons of the maidservants by calling them "slaves"; Yosef himself therefore suffered the humiliation of slavery. Finally, he accused them of sexual misconduct; God therefore put Yosef to the test, forcing him to resist the seduction of Potifar's wife. In spite of Yosef's sincere motives, he was punished for speaking negatively about his brothers.
The Ralbag, in his commentary to this parasha, spells out the message that emerges from this tragic incident: "It is not proper for a person to tell his father everything he hears of the inappropriate conduct of the other family members. This will give rise to domestic strife and contention and cause oneself harm. Indeed, as a result of his having brought bad reports about his brothers to his father, his brothers despised him to the point where they would have killed him, if not for God's assistance."
Perhaps one important lesson to be extracted from this story is the need to overlook, to ignore. We do not have to - and in fact should not - take notice of every wrongdoing committed around us. Not every inappropriate action deserves a response. We must learn to accept the imperfection of others, especially those closest to us, and overlook mistakes and mishaps. By once in a while looking away from the faults of our close friends and relatives, we can help engender greater friendship and harmony in our homes and communities.
A more general lesson arises from this story, as well: sincere motives do not justify everything. The fact that one acts with pure intentions does not grant "kosher certification" to everything he does. We must carefully assess our conduct even when we act in sincerity, to ensure that we are not making any tragic errors - such as the one made by Yosef ha-Tzadik himself.